Previously, in an earlier commentary:
"...The cohesiveness of the metaphor fluctuating depending on what you replace pizza with and the particular moment we're at."
This is one moment in particular where I favored silliness over general cohesiveness.
I'm not saying there's no cohesiveness. Plenty of people have complained about Twilight without ever actually reading / seeing it, and there are other ways to interpret it (such as someone simply not having a firm grasp on what they're complaining about).
I'm just saying that, if you're not taking "pizza" literally, this moment may or may not fit into your narrative depending on what "pizza" has become in your mind.